For Ever

Posted on June 24, 2016 Updated on June 24, 2016

Nostalgia is a wonderful emotion that I sink into gratefully whenever it strikes me, because it’s a kinder state of grace than memory, which can sometimes settle on the unpleasant things that have happened in life. Even its definition is perfect: “a sentimental longing or wistful affection for the past”, although sometimes it’s hard for me to believe that “the past” truly is as far off in the distance as time would tell us. I thought about this when I found myself listening to The Smashing Pumpkins music this week, marveling at the idea that I bought the album Mellon Collie and the Infinite Sadness over twenty years ago. I can still remember listening to it softly on late autumn nights, its wildly diverse musicality underscoring everything from my first real kiss to my … well, sadder moments where my thoughts don’t wish to dwell. And it’s one of those rare albums that has songs on it that make you want to drive fast and live hard, as well as swoon underneath starlight in a lover’s embrace.

The song that has stuck with me most over the years and become a true favorite is “Thirty-Three”. I had always associated its title with the age, thinking back in my tender teenage years about how far away in time my 30s seemed to be, and wondering how they would find me when I arrived. Happy and hopeful, I aspired. Having a beautiful life with wonderful things in store. And while real life sometimes has its challenges, certainly my Second Life has met those hopes and beyond, and in its way, often feels like it exists with fewer limits, greater possibilities, and always more amazing people, places, and experiences to discover. I know I often wax poetic and romantic about SL, but I love that; I wouldn’t be so charmed and compelled to spend time within its virtual embrace if it wasn’t filling me with anticipation and contentment in equal measure. And you know me, dear ones: I love positive energy and try to radiate it fully. In the words of one of my favorite philosophers, “all is well and getting weller”. And in the lyrics of the Smashing Pumpkins, “tomorrow’s just an excuse, and you can make it last forever”.

So I’m dedicating the 33rd* self-portrait I’ve taken in Second Life this year to this wonderful idea of being content where I am, and eager for what’s coming. I went back to the always-inspiring Baja Bay, the place I took my first picture after returning to SL, and used the same hairstyle too, which is also a sentimental nod to my belief that Elikatira created the first hairstyle I ever purchased in Second Life. A lustrous pair of eyes from Avi-Glam, my very favorite eye designer, and the charmingly-named Ever Anchor necklace by YS&YS were further meaningful touches. I think I shall make this my profile picture for a while too; its lovely sunrise reminds me of how much I adore the beaches of SL, and how vivid colors and beautiful vistas always uplift my spirit. You’ll always know me as a sentimentalist, gracious readers, and hopefully with many more delighted moments in the virtual world to share. Here’s to the next 33 pictures, the next 33 places visited and people met, and to the next 33 years that life has to offer. ♡

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“And for a moment I lose myself
Wrapped up in the pleasures of the world
I’ve journeyed here and there and back again
But in the same old haunts I still find my friends …
I’ll make the effort, love can last forever
Graceful swans of never topple to the earth
Tomorrow’s just an excuse
And you can make it last, forever you …”

* I realized after writing this post that I had miscounted, and this is actually my 32nd picture of the year. Grrrr! I could switch the ordering and wait till I get another one done, but being able to laugh at my mistake and be gentle about it makes me feel charmed and happy, so I’m putting this up as is. If you can’t be kind with yourself about your mis-steps, you’ll never be able to move forward. Here’s to making the effort; may it last forever. ♥